THE MISSING BALL - - - - -
Sir, he has one ball missing.
What ?? An officer without balls. Not even a day old and having doubts already. You are too bloody young in the Army to be seeking such luxury.
(He was being Medically examined prior to the Court Martial. The rest of the comments he couldn't make head or tale of. In any case he was too nervous to think straight )
How did he get through the Medicals any way, wondered the Medical Officer aloud. Must have hidden facts he simultaneously concluded.
(He was trying to think hard. He had counted them both and so had the doctor in the Military Hospital during his medical examination, so what is this fuss about ? The conversation between him, the Company Commander and the Doctor was part of preliminary inquiry, which was as good as over. He was not only a 'Coward', he had also 'cheated' his way into the Army by concealing medical facts, the 'Board of Officers' had finally concluded.
I order Summary Court Martial to be held at 1600 Hr today, barked the Company Commander. Subedar Major, march him out.
The doctor was actually the Adjutant of the unit, an art graduate with no medical background (which explains the fantastic Medical diagnosis), The Company Cdr was actually the Regimental Medical Officer ( which explains the legal knowledge ) and the Subedar Major was the Unit 2nd in Command which explains the detailed conspiracy. The newly commissioned officer had had a tough day. He had reached the unit having traveled eight hours in a 'One Ton'. He was ambushed enroute which he thought he had successfully fought all though the militants who were never seen were able to make a clean escape and hence the charge of 'Cowardice'. Now it seems in that melee, he had also dropped a ball.
The 2nd Lieutenant who had joined the Unit after commissioning, with great hope, was in shock. The charge of 'Cowardice in the face of the enemy' was shameful enough; but the missing ball ?? Then what was it that he had felt just last night and which even now feels like one. But the 'Doctor' had checked and the 'Doctor' had concluded and recorded in the Medical history sheet. It was final. He had a ball missing.
The newly commissioned 2nd Lt was Court Martialed at 1600 Hrs in ten minutes flat and punished with demotion in Rank for five years and was immediately demoted to rank of a Subedar Major !!! the next lower rank after 2nd Lieutenant. The punishment was for 'Cowardice'. He was given benefit of doubt and had been dealt with leniently on the second charge. He would now have to report to the Military Hospital for further checkups.
The rest of the story is simple. The young 2nd lieutenant (now demoted to a Subedar Major), on his way to Military Hospital was dismounted from the train and brought to the unit. He was given a warm welcome and promoted to the rank of a 2nd Lieutenant once again and was permitted to join the elite family. The enemy that had ambushed him the previous day, joined him in the 'Dining in'. The question of the missing ball was never raised, and as if to vindicate the general belief, he continues to make it to the next rank with or without them.
He also commanded the unit he was Court Martialed in, the day he had joined it, and continues to rise high, not the least because of the less weight he has to carry.
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